From the Back Streets of Johannesburg to Inner Peace
My Journey Transforming Martial Arts the Crazy Monkey Way
Reflecting on my life, I'm reminded of Viktor Frankl's words: "When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves." At 17, I found myself homeless on the unforgiving streets of Johannesburg. Nights were spent seeking shelter wherever I could find it; days were a blur of uncertainty and survival.
Desperate for a way out, I joined the South African military. It offered a lifeline—a chance to impose structure on chaos and find purpose amidst turmoil. Later, working as a bouncer, I was thrust into situations that tested the limits of my endurance and courage. These harsh experiences forged within me a resilience that became the bedrock of my philosophy.
Throughout it all, martial arts was my constant companion—a silent mentor guiding me towards a better version of myself. It taught me that flourishing isn't a destination but a journey—a continuous process of growth, reflection, and self-improvement.
Navigating the Night: Lessons from the Streets
From 1993 onwards, my nights were spent under the flickering neon lights of Johannesburg's most notorious nightclubs. As the head bouncer, I stood as the wall between order and anarchy. The air was thick with tension—a cocktail of adrenaline, aggression, and unpredictability. Each evening was a crucible, testing not just my physical prowess but also my mental fortitude.
One night stands out like a scar that has long healed but never faded. A confrontation escalated beyond the usual bravado, turning dangerously violent. Surrounded by hostility, I felt a strange calm wash over me. Time seemed to slow; every movement became deliberate. I wasn't just reacting; I was fully present, every sense heightened yet controlled. In that moment, I realised that true mastery wasn't about overpowering others but mastering oneself amidst the storm.
Even then, amid the chaos, a voice inside urged me to seek something deeper. The physical battles were mere shadows of a greater struggle—the quest for inner peace from a lifetime of trauma and a yearning to understand myself.
The Enigma of Michael: A Lesson in Inner Mastery
During my years boxing under the legendary Willie Toweel, from ages 15 to 22, I trained alongside a boxer named Michael. To this day, I've never seen anyone as naturally gifted as he was. Michael was a virtuoso in the ring—his movements a seamless blend of speed, power, and grace. He was the boxer I aspired to be, the embodiment of potential.
When world champions came to our gym to prepare for title bouts, Michael was their go-to sparring partner. He would dismantle them with an ease that left everyone in awe. Yet, when it came time to compete publicly, Michael unravelled. Nerves consumed him, turning his formidable skills into fragmented efforts. Willie would shout from the corner, his voice tinged with frustration and concern, "Relax! Stay calm!" But the words fell into the void of Michael's anxiety.
Willie was an incredible mentor to me, and without his guidance, my boxing-inspired programme, Crazy Monkey Defence, might never have come into being. But even he lacked the tools to help Michael conquer his inner demons. Eventually, Michael disappeared from the gym. Months later, I saw him washing cars to make ends meet—a prodigious talent lost to the undercurrents of his own mind.
That moment struck me deeply. It illustrated how even the most gifted individuals can be sidelined when they lack the means to master their inner world. It showed me that telling someone to "calm down" is meaningless without providing them with the tools to do so. Michael's story became a catalyst for my commitment to teaching not just the physical aspects of martial arts but also the mental and emotional skills necessary for true mastery.
A Turning Point: Discovering Embodiment
In 2005, amidst a tumultuous journey of self-discovery, I found myself wandering through a dimly lit bookstore in Johannesburg. The city outside pulsed with its usual rhythm of chaos and possibility, but inside, time seemed to slow. My fingers brushed against a book tucked away on a shelf as if hiding in plain sight: Radical Knowing by Dr Christian de Quincey.
As I leafed through its pages, a passage caught my eye—a discourse on embodiment. It spoke of the mind not as a caged entity within the skull but as a force permeating every cell, extending beyond the physical form into the very fabric of the world. A jolt coursed through me. Someone had finally put into words the unspoken language my body had been trying to convey for years.
Martial arts had always been more to me than a series of techniques. On the mat, I felt a connection—a silent dialogue between movement and meaning, a dance that transcended the physical. Yet, I struggled to articulate this feeling, to bridge the gap between intuition and expression. Dr de Quincey's words were the missing link, the key that unlocked a deeper understanding of my own journey.
Compelled by this connection, I reached out to Dr de Quincey. What began as a reader's appreciation blossomed into a profound friendship. Not long after, I embarked on a six-month intensive internship with him, diving deep into the study of consciousness. Together, we conducted workshops that wove together different ways of knowing with the practice of martial arts—a beautiful fusion of mind, body, and spirit.
A Reflection on Embodiment
The concept of embodiment wasn't just an intellectual revelation; it was a visceral awakening. I began to see martial arts not merely as combat but as a living philosophy—a way to inhabit the world fully. The mind and body are not separate; they are intertwined threads of the same tapestry.
At the School of Crazy Monkey, this belief forms the core of what I teach. I don't just instruct students on how to execute a punch or a kick; I guide them to inhabit each movement with presence and intention. It's about forging harmony between the inner and outer selves so that every action becomes an expression of one's true human potential.
The Quest for the "How": Bridging Science and Practice
These life experiences fuelled my determination to understand the mechanisms of inner calm, presence, focus, and lifelong resilience. So, I took the plunge and went back to school. Through the financial success of teaching martial arts, I was able to fund my education, from undergraduate studies all the way to earning a PhD.
I wanted to study the science behind human flourishing—to understand not just how to survive but how to thrive. I delved into psychology, neuroscience, mindfulness, and any discipline that could shed light on the "how" of flourishing. This journey led to the development of the Full Contact Living Programme for trainers at the School of Crazy Monkey.
Two of the key components of this programme are:
Present-Defence: Cultivating an unshakable presence—a state of being where you are fully engaged in the moment without being overwhelmed by it. It's a skill that extends beyond the mat, applicable in high-stress professions and everyday life alike.
Breath-Defence: Teaching control over physiological responses. Through a colour-coded system I created, we guide students in breath regulation techniques that help manage stress and maintain composure. Whether facing a physical threat or a challenging life situation, these tools empower our students to navigate adversity with grace and confidence.
Defining What Makes Crazy Monkey Different
At the School of Crazy Monkey, we focus on training both the inner and outer games. We teach our students not just how to defend themselves physically but how to navigate life's challenges with grace and resilience.
Consider John, a law enforcement officer who came to me after a close call in the line of duty. He possessed all the tactical training one could ask for, yet he felt unprepared for the psychological toll of his experiences. Through a Full Contact Living approach, he learned to process stress in a healthy way, remain present, and make decisions from a place of clarity rather than fear and anxiety.
My philosophy acknowledges that mind and body are inseparable—they are, in fact, one. True mastery comes from not seeing them as separate entities but as a continuum, each informing and elevating the other. This holistic approach sets us apart and enables our students to thrive both on and off the mat.
An Invitation to Journey Together
While this is but a brief interlude into my life and journey in martial arts, today I stand humbled and grateful for the path that has led me here. The School of Crazy Monkey is more than a fight school; it's a community of seekers, mindful warriors committed to living fully. We embrace an art form that has been a catalyst for human excellence since time began.
Rather than avoiding their survival instincts or expressing them in unhealthy ways, my students learn to transform these instincts into a powerful catalyst for personal flourishing. We are united by a shared belief that martial arts, when approached with the right intention, can be a transformative force—not just in physical prowess but in shaping the way we engage with the world.
I teach my students to embrace challenges, find strength in vulnerability, and cultivate a presence that radiates beyond the mat. To those who feel a stirring within—a call to explore the depths of their potential—I extend an open invitation. Join us and discover how the principles of the Crazy Monkey Way can enrich every facet of your life.
Closing Thoughts: Embracing the Mindful Warrior Within
Martial arts is a mirror reflecting the essence of who we are. It reveals our strengths, exposes our weaknesses, and offers a path towards wholeness. At the School of Crazy Monkey, we don't shy away from this introspection; we embrace it as the foundation of true mastery.
Together, let's redefine what it means to be a mindful warrior—not just in combat but in life. Let's embark on a journey towards self-discovery, resilience, and flourishing. The path won't always be easy, but I promise it will be worthwhile.